I had the best of intentions to get this up last week, but between work and a much-needed weekend away I never got around to posting it. So I'll post this one from last week's lesson and then get this week's post done in the next day or so...
If we only had the Genesis account, we'd be pretty upset with Eve. After all, it seems at first glance that she blew it for everyone by eating the forbidden fruit (which was probably zucchini, in my opinion). They got kicked out of paradise and we're stuck in a world of thorns and thistles. Moral of the story, be a little more cautious when your wife wants to try out a new recipe...
Fortunately, we have more information available to us. The prophet Lehi taught his son Jacob about the effects of the fall of Adam:
"And now, behold, if Adam had not transgressed he would not have fallen, but he would have remained in the garden of Eden..." (2 Nephi 2:22)
That doesn't sound too bad so far.
"And they would have had no children..." (2 Nephi 2:23)
So now it seems Eve knew what she was doing when she ate the fruit. They were commanded to multiply and replenish the earth, something they could not do in their current condition. So, what does that have to do with marriage? Well, if we don't understand why Adam and Eve chose to eat the fruit and leave the garden, the rest doesn't really make sense.
Tip #1 - Support your spouse.
When asked why he had eaten the fruit, Adam responded that the "woman thou ... commandest that she should remain with me" gave him the fruit and he ate it. He's not trying to pass the buck or blame his wife, he's saying he transgressed one commandment in order to obey the higher one. As is often the case in marriage, we sometimes give up something good for something even better.
Tip #2 - "thy desire shall be to thy [spouse]" (Moses 4:22)
How many of today's marital problems could be avoided or eliminated if each spouse held the other in the #1 position? President Gordon B. Hinckley taught:
"When you are married, be fiercely loyal one to another. Selfishness is the great destroyer of happy family life. If you will make your first concern the comfort, the well-being, and the happiness of your companion, sublimating any personal concern to that loftier goal, you will be happy, and your marriage will go on throughout eternity" ("Excerpts from Recent Addresses of President Gordon B. Hinckley," Ensign, Dec. 1995, 67)
Not just devoted, but "fiercely loyal". He's not just talking about letting another person take the place of your spouse, but activities and interests can become more important to you than your spouse if not done in moderation. Online games, time at the office, sports, etc., although not inherently "evil", can be placed in the position which should be occupied by your spouse.
Tip #3 - Work with your spouse
After they left the garden, "Adam began to till the earth... to eat his bread by the sweat of his brow... And Eve, also, his wife, did labor with him." (Moses 5:1).
One thing that frosts my hide (and I hope I'm not guilty of this) is fathers/husbands who feel that when they get home from work their duty is done. One of the best, and arguably more important, places to work with your spouse is at home.
"By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners." (The Family: A Proclamation to the World, emphasis added)
Don't start "keeping score" of the things you do vs. what your spouse does, because we are by nature very poor score keepers. We tend to see the things we do and miss the other stuff that goes on around us. We only keep score when we want to win, which tends to promote a competitive atmosphere. Marriage is not a competition, it's a cooperation.
Anyhow, those were my thoughts from the lesson...
If we only had the Genesis account, we'd be pretty upset with Eve. After all, it seems at first glance that she blew it for everyone by eating the forbidden fruit (which was probably zucchini, in my opinion). They got kicked out of paradise and we're stuck in a world of thorns and thistles. Moral of the story, be a little more cautious when your wife wants to try out a new recipe...
Fortunately, we have more information available to us. The prophet Lehi taught his son Jacob about the effects of the fall of Adam:
"And now, behold, if Adam had not transgressed he would not have fallen, but he would have remained in the garden of Eden..." (2 Nephi 2:22)
That doesn't sound too bad so far.
"And they would have had no children..." (2 Nephi 2:23)
So now it seems Eve knew what she was doing when she ate the fruit. They were commanded to multiply and replenish the earth, something they could not do in their current condition. So, what does that have to do with marriage? Well, if we don't understand why Adam and Eve chose to eat the fruit and leave the garden, the rest doesn't really make sense.
Tip #1 - Support your spouse.
When asked why he had eaten the fruit, Adam responded that the "woman thou ... commandest that she should remain with me" gave him the fruit and he ate it. He's not trying to pass the buck or blame his wife, he's saying he transgressed one commandment in order to obey the higher one. As is often the case in marriage, we sometimes give up something good for something even better.
Tip #2 - "thy desire shall be to thy [spouse]" (Moses 4:22)
How many of today's marital problems could be avoided or eliminated if each spouse held the other in the #1 position? President Gordon B. Hinckley taught:
"When you are married, be fiercely loyal one to another. Selfishness is the great destroyer of happy family life. If you will make your first concern the comfort, the well-being, and the happiness of your companion, sublimating any personal concern to that loftier goal, you will be happy, and your marriage will go on throughout eternity" ("Excerpts from Recent Addresses of President Gordon B. Hinckley," Ensign, Dec. 1995, 67)
Not just devoted, but "fiercely loyal". He's not just talking about letting another person take the place of your spouse, but activities and interests can become more important to you than your spouse if not done in moderation. Online games, time at the office, sports, etc., although not inherently "evil", can be placed in the position which should be occupied by your spouse.
Tip #3 - Work with your spouse
After they left the garden, "Adam began to till the earth... to eat his bread by the sweat of his brow... And Eve, also, his wife, did labor with him." (Moses 5:1).
One thing that frosts my hide (and I hope I'm not guilty of this) is fathers/husbands who feel that when they get home from work their duty is done. One of the best, and arguably more important, places to work with your spouse is at home.
"By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners." (The Family: A Proclamation to the World, emphasis added)
Don't start "keeping score" of the things you do vs. what your spouse does, because we are by nature very poor score keepers. We tend to see the things we do and miss the other stuff that goes on around us. We only keep score when we want to win, which tends to promote a competitive atmosphere. Marriage is not a competition, it's a cooperation.
Anyhow, those were my thoughts from the lesson...
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